Need Help With My Son.. Plz Help!!?
I know this is a lot, but please read everything to fully understand the situation, I really need help with my son.
Im having some problems with my son. He is 15 years old, and a pretty good kid. Doesn’t do drugs or get into a lot of trouble. He wants to be a rapper, just like every other teenage kid. But he is very good and takes it very seriously. We recently moved which made him very upset. He didnt do anything. Just stayed in the house. He stopped going to school and eventually we had to let him drop out. Even the police insisted on that was the only thing we could do at this point. He just didnt like it here. Not just that we moved, he has never seemed to be happy. But when we were at our old house, its where he has been ever since he could remember. All of his family were around there, and even though he didnt always see them or really try to, they were there. And now we moved and its just me, his dad, and his little sister. Lately I was able to tell he was miserable here. Everything was gone that he knew ever since he could remember anything. So I decided to let him go back and stay with his grandparents. Like I said, he isnt a bad kid, just does bad things. I know he is affiliated with a set of Bloods, not really in the gang, but is friends with people who are, so that brings him into problems with Crips. Our neighborhood wasn’t that good. Violence and things like that. We also didnt have a lot of money. I got promoted in my job so we moved. But that didnt make much of a difference. Even though I was getting a little bit more money, I have to spend more money. And his dad, doesnt do anything. He is a good dad, but he often leaves for weeks or months at a time to go see his friends who live in another state, and I know my son doesnt like that. Not so much that he cares about seeing him, which isnt good, but its just that he doesnt like him not contributing anything. I even have to give him money to leave and send him money when he is gone. My son also found out he was cheating on me and when he would leave the state saying different things, he would be with her and spent my money to go see her. She even had 2 kids and they called him dad. He showed me, but I cant leave him. Its hard to explain.
Anyways, it seems like he is so much happier back in our old neighborhood. He is around his friends and things like that, and I think he just feels like he is home again. He wants to be a rapper and producer, just like every teenager does. But he is really very good and takes things very seriously. Recently I found out he has been selling drugs to get money for studio time. Here is the part Im sure nobody is going to belive, but an A&R at 50 Cent’s G-Unit Records told 50 Cent (or Curtis Jackson) about him. He got in contact with me, telling me he is interested in signing him. My son is actually on probation, because he got jumped by about 4 people because he was messing with someone’s girlfriend, and he was hurt pretty bad. But in our neighborhood, people in that life dont tell police. That causes more trouble and makes them feel like they are scared or something. So often times they take it upon theirselves to do something about it. So later that night, my son found out who did it. And him and some other kids got back at them and my son put one of them in a coma for 2 weeks. So he is on probation, and his probation officer didnt think it was a good idea to let this happen, so he couldent sign. Which is bs. That would get him out of this lifestyle. 50 Cent, one of the biggest rappers in the world wanted to sign my son. And they didnt let it happen. That is horrible.
So I know he is definently upset about that. Like I said, he takes this very seriously and is actually talented, not like Souljah Boy or any of these other teenage artists who arent really good. And the one chance he had has been taken away from him.
Im afraid this is going to lead to other problems. I try to talk to him but he isnt the type to express feelings, he never has. So what should I do? How should I go about talking to him? I hope I dont seem like a bad mother for not addressing this on my own, but I dont know what to do.
Thanks to anyone who offers advice.
You still have legal custody right? I would probably get him to a psychologist or psychiatrist soon. It is a terrible idea to let him associate with any gang members because with time he will become one. I would bring him home, and get him some help.
Btw post this question in another section because you won’t find much with beauty.
okay if he wants his own studio maybe u can covert the the basment into a studio
and if ur an only mother than u should ask the goverment for some money because your an only mother with children
also maybe every weekend u can vistit ur old neighborhood
and by the way i promise i did read everything
First of all this shouldn’t be in beauty and style. Anyways, to me it seems as if you are standing up for your kid regardless of what he does. He was a drug dealer, for all you know someone he was dealing to could’ve O/Ded and died, and it would be your son’s fault. He needs to get his life back together, or somewhat pieced together as it seems that it was never back together in the first place. If he is on probation it is probably best that he could not sign the deal. I know you love and support your son but he did a lot of wrong, and regardless of whether they deserved it a kid was in a coma for 2 weeks. Signing that deal will just make the violence and drugs worse, as rappers are often known for doing horrible things. My best wishes go out to you, but you must understand that it isn’t your fault that your son does all this stuff, and you should be there for him, but don’t try to cover up his wrongdoings, they are his problem not yours.
If this is for real, than the adult who wanted to sign him should talk to the probabtion officer with you and your son at a meeting. you should also include someone from school.
I wojld create some positive out of all this
First, let the kid sign BUT he MUST go to school or at least be tutored. Finishing school is critical.
He must follow the terms of his probation and the PB and the guy from the studio can help mentor your son and be a good role model for him.
Your son needs a schedule and routine to keep him away from the gangs the drugs and the negative influences.
Talk to your son and tell him that you’ll help based on these conditions. Without an education the rest is pretty tough.
I wouldn’t hand a 15 yr old a contract. He also needs an advocate who will help him and keep his best interests at heart. The entertainment world is tough and mean. More drugs, debauched lifestyles and difficult for somewhat uneducated 15 yr old kid.
This needs to be carefully managed.
Good luck mom.
There was a lot of crap in there. We really didn’t need to know every single part of your and your son’s life. :/ I think some of that was inappropriate.
But anyways, being a ‘rapper’ isn’t about getting signed and all that it’s about doing it because you really want to and it’s something you enjoy. Not to be heard or to live off of. That’s the problem with the music industry and people today. So if you think your son really has talent but he’s messing up too much in his life. Then talk to him first.
You should explain that if he wants to pursue this as a career he needs to straighten up. Explain that if he REALLY cared about the music he wouldn’t be throwing away opportunities for these drugs and problems.
But until then he could make some demos or mixes and put them on MySpace, or other websites. Spread the word let people hear his talent. Then if he really is good, even more labels will be wanting to sign him, and maybe he will understand and learn/grow wiser with time.
Let him know that it isn’t over just because he missed one opportunity. And tell him to keep doing what he loves.
I’ve read it all and I think everytime you get paid put some money aside for about 1/2 years and then make a room in your house into a music room like a record studio with the right equipment.
I find it really hard to believe 50 cent just decided to contact you about your son. I’m not saying your lying but I think that the offer could have been accepted or get back in contact with him again.
Maybe he should get like a councilor so he can tell he/she why he is sad, career prospects etc. He won’t want to speak to you because he will be embarassed and if his dad is barely there then he needs someone to talk too. If he gets a councilor then his mood will be lightened and he will begin to express himself more and will maybe give you some feedback.
You said your child doesn’t do drugs or anything but he IS selling them and there might be a good chance he is taking them if he can get his hands on them to sell. This sounds harsh but by letting him hang about with the people he is the now might make him happy now but in the long run he might get addicted to drugs, alchoholic and won’t get grades at school needed for jobs. You really need to get him away from them people and make sure he is ok.
Give him compliments ALL the time and tell him you love him. Make sure he knows your there for him no matter what.
and leave your cheating husband! the cheek of letting someone else’s children call him dad.
I read this and alot of comments come to mind however the most beneficial might be… if someone in Curtis Jackson’s “camp” called you or he called you… maybe talk further with them…. See if someone there might be willing to mentor your son… not only to develop and produce his rapping, but mentoring is also a way to help him personally. You also might want to look at the local Y or Boys Club. Encourage him to find people in the rap/record biz, and ask about mentoring or even interning. Give him something to take pride in and it may get him off the streets and away from the people who are going to bring him down.
As you know he’s at a difficult age and talking with mom is not high on the list and sounds like Dad is no help.
First you should get rid of the husband. No excuses. You are living in a bad enviroment. If I was your son I would be depressed knowing my mom pays for my dad to leave and he cheats. I have to do without cause my dad is a bumb. As to your son a probation officer cannot control your son unless what he is doing is illegal or if he has to travel out of jurisdiction an din most instances he can get permission for that. But your son being a good person but has gang affiliations and he is on probation. Hrmm might be nice id but a good kid is a far stretch. I would suggest that the rap industry might not be good for him without strong supervision. You both need counseling and you need to wake up.
im sorry about that Madam but i really dont know what to do.
you should really leave ur hudbend cos he DID cheat.
just as a matter or interest? does you son have a connection with bad things? Even your husband cheating is a bad influece to your son. I really thing you sould leave David (just picking a random name for theb husband)
if you let David go on anylonger he might kiss make out have s*x with the new girl. Plus its bad for Mike (random name for your son)
If Mike knows DAvid cheats, he might cheat on his Wife. Or commit sucide. I’m sorry Mam but you should really brake up….